medically induced coma

Posted on July 12, 2009


so it’s been a while since my last update, which i would apologize for, but i’m honestly not sorry.  and do the three people (myself included) who follow this blog really need an apology?  if you feel slighted, maybe it’s time to put on your big boy pants, rub some dirt on it, walk it off, or *insert other republican pull-yourself-up-by-your-bootsraps-esque colloquialism here* and get on with your life.  after all, that’s what i’ve been doing lately. i haven’t had a good run in a little over two weeks now.  strike that.  i haven’t had a run in a little over two weeks now, and it’s killing me.  i actually found myself saying “not being able to run sucks.”  now, if you know me, you’ve probably just choked on your morning coffee and/or scotch, trying to figure out when i actually started enjoying voluntary physical fitness that doesn’t involved chasing a ball or puck.  hell, i’m surprised too.  when i started this whole running thing, i was fully prepared for it to be one of the many exercise fads in my life.  i’m the kind of person who gets a momentary inspiration to do something active, i go get some new gear (maybe a nice pair of the bike brand shorts that are standard issue for high school gym teachers), i work out for two weeks, then i fall off the face of the earth like i’ve won american idol and people realize how shitty my first single is.  but not with running.  i’ve stuck with it past my typical two weeks, or should i say it has stuck with me.  beyond the physical changes that have gone on since i started running (and no, they aren’t the judy blume coming of age changes), i’ve had just a better attitude and, dare i say, zen? about me.  first and foremost, i’ve lost weight.  secondly, i’ve been getting much better sleep since i started running.  in the past, i’ve had major problems with sleep.  during college and law school, i wouldn’t fall asleep until 4 or 5 in the morning, wake up 8 or 9 times for no reason, then get up at 8/9/10 and go about my day, feeling dead inside.  now i actually have something that loosely resembles a schedule and i automatically wake up around 530 every morning, workday or otherwise.  and i’ve just been a more pleasant person overall.  i look forward to the clock hitting 8 or 830 on running days.  i look forward to trying different routes on my run.  i look forward to the day i get to bump up my intervals a notch.  i look at my progress and where i’m going.  i look up local 5 and 10k races to sign up for.  i love the feeling i get when i get home from a run, sit down on the porch with a bottle of ice cold water and a bag of frozen peas on my knee, and just talk to my wife about how the run went.  i know, i’m turning into a huge loser…but a huge loser who can now change out of his dress pants after work without having to unbutton them.  suck it trebek.

but i guess i should get to the original point behind this post.  i haven’t been able to run as of late due to a medical condition.  i’d fill you in on the details, but a) i’m invoking my rights under title II of hipaa, which dictates certain rules regarding the protection of my health information, and more importantly b) it’s probably disgusting and not really all that important.  but not to worry, if you’re of the kind to do so: it’s nothing life-threatening or imminently debilitating.  surprisingly, it has nothing to do with me knees or arthritis.  i view it as a bit of a freak illness myself, something that you can’t really do much to stop other than treat it.  but, according to my “doctor,”

i'm smarter than you.  i wear a paper mask.

i'm smarter than you. i wear a paper mask.

i probably shouldn’t run until this issue is resolved.  and i say “doctor” because, according to my degrees, i’m also a “doctor,” but you don’t see me going around with a stethoscope, rubber gloves and one of those old school round silver things on my head.    nevermind the fact that my doctorate has nothing to do with medicine.  in spite of these reservations about the educational and experiential backgrounds of my health care provider, i’m inclined to listen to her and put the running aside until things are better.  of course, the next time i have a medical issue, i’ll be sure to thoroughly examine this “doctor’s” credentials and get a detailed history of her personal and professional life…i’ve got my suspicions with the medical field in general, if you couldn’t tell.

everything else aside, i am excited to get back to running.  involuntary time off has been bad enough, but the medication i’ve been on doesn’t exactly make me feel top notch either.  but it has given me a lot of time to pursue the other priorities in my life, such as spending time with our dogs, reading the news, and googling “i’m bored, what should i do that doesn’t cost a lot of money?”   the dogs appreciate seem to appreciate my time, i’m much more up to date on what’s going on in the world, and google has left me feeling as satisfied as a californian waiting for his tax return.  so i’m ready to get back to it…probably wednesday of this coming week.

i'll be pay you.

i'll be pay you.

in the meantime, i really have been making the most of my free time.  listening to a lot of npr, spending time with the wife and dogs, and picking up the house search.  in fact, we’re headed out to rural south carolina to take a closer look at some homes today, so hopefully i’ll have some good news.  i have also taken advantage of the new IBR student loan repayment plan, which not only lowers my payments (always good, considering my current payments equal a mortgage payment on a small home) but also helps me work towards loan forgiveness as a public servant – so for all those people who questioned me for passing up a job as an attorney in the private sector for the federal government, join alex trebek (see above).  but for those of you who have student loans, i’d suggest checking it out on the department of education’s website or at don’t forget to buy your tickets for my triumphant return to the world of recreational jogging, featuring special guest buckets o’sweat and the wheezers.  tickets on sale now – pay for the whole seat, but you’ll only need the edge…

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